The Family Holiday Is Changing
ALLES magazine feature article
“Children Remember Experiences”
The traditional family holiday can sometimes become an exercise in logistics. Pack the car, remember the swimming costumes, find the charger, stop for snacks, keep everyone entertained, arrive, unpack and then try to fit as many activities as possible into the available time. Before you know it, the holiday is over and everyone is exhausted from trying to make the most of it.
But there is another way to think about family travel. Perhaps a successful holiday is not the one where you manage to do the most, visit the most attractions or follow the most carefully planned itinerary. Perhaps it is the one where you spend the most meaningful time together. A family holiday can be an opportunity to slow down, put some of the ordinary responsibilities aside and simply enjoy being together somewhere different.
Children Remember Experiences
Ask adults about their favourite childhood holidays and they often remember surprisingly ordinary details. They may remember the smell of a campfire in the evening, swimming with cousins until their fingers went wrinkly, eating pancakes at a little restaurant or sitting beside Dad while waiting for a fish to bite. They may remember playing cards with grandparents, getting caught in the rain or falling asleep in the car on the way home.
They may also remember the bigger adventures. A family trip to the beach can become a childhood memory that lasts for decades. A first visit to an aquarium, standing mesmerised in front of enormous tanks filled with colourful fish, can become something a child talks about for years. Seeing elephants, giraffes or lions in the wild can create a sense of wonder that no photograph quite manages to capture. A weekend at a farm, a camping trip under the stars, a hike through the mountains or the excitement of seeing snow for the first time can all become part of a child’s personal collection of memories.
Interestingly, the attraction itself is not always what remains. Years later, a child may not remember the name of the resort or how much the entrance fee cost, but they might remember Mum laughing when everyone got soaked in the rain, Dad carrying them when their legs became tired, the smell of breakfast cooking in the morning or the excitement of running towards the sea.
These are the kinds of experiences that can become what we often think of as core memories. They are the stories children carry with them as they grow older and eventually tell to their own families. They do not have to be expensive or extraordinary. What makes them important is that they were experienced together.
Time Is the Real Luxury
Modern family life can be busy. Parents work, children attend school, there are sports practices, homework, appointments, household responsibilities and screens competing for everyone’s attention. Even when a family is physically together, everyone can be occupied with something different.
A holiday creates an opportunity to interrupt that routine. Suddenly, there is nowhere else you need to be. There is time to sit. Time to talk. Time to play. Time to explore. Time to notice each other without constantly checking what needs to happen next.
That may be more valuable than an expensive itinerary. A family does not necessarily need to fill every hour with activities to make a holiday worthwhile. Sometimes sitting around a table for a long breakfast, taking an afternoon walk or watching the children play can become some of the most meaningful parts of the trip.
Experiences Across Generations
Some destinations naturally bring different generations together, creating opportunities for grandparents, parents and children to share an experience rather than simply spending time in the same place. Fishing is a good example. A grandparent can teach a child how to cast, a parent can prepare lunch and the child can spend the afternoon telling everyone about the enormous fish that almost got away.
The activity itself may be simple, but it becomes a story that belongs to the whole family. Years later, the family may laugh about the fish, the terrible weather or the one person who accidentally dropped something into the water. The accommodation may be forgotten, but the story remains.
This is one of the special things about family travel. A holiday can create memories between generations that might otherwise never have happened. Grandparents can share skills and stories with grandchildren, parents can experience new things alongside their children and siblings can create memories that they will eventually look back on together.
Choosing a Family Destination
When choosing somewhere to stay, it can be useful to ask a different set of questions. Can everyone participate? Is there somewhere safe for children to explore? Are there activities suitable for different ages? Is there enough space for the family to relax? Can everyone spend time together without constantly having to pay for another attraction or activity?
A family-friendly destination does not need to entertain every member of the family separately. In fact, some of the best family experiences come from activities everyone can enjoy together. A swimming pool, walking trail, fishing spot, beach, picnic area, wildlife experience or communal braai can provide an opportunity for parents and children to participate in the same experience.
The goal is not necessarily to find somewhere with the longest list of facilities. It is to find somewhere that creates opportunities for the family to connect. Sometimes, having enough space to sit outside together in the evening can be just as valuable as having a packed entertainment programme.
The Holiday Doesn’t Have to Be Perfect
Children will argue. Someone will forget something. It may rain on the day you planned to go to the beach. The food may burn. The car journey may take longer than expected. Someone may get tired, someone may get sunburned and there may be at least one moment when a parent wonders why they thought taking the whole family away was a good idea in the first place. And somehow, those imperfect moments often become part of the memory.
When children grow up, they do not necessarily remember whether their parents managed to keep everything perfectly organised. They remember the experiences they shared. They remember the holidays when they played on the beach, explored somewhere new, watched animals, stayed up late around a campfire or laughed with their family until their stomachs hurt.
For parents, creating those memories can sometimes come with stress. Family holidays cost money, require planning and can involve a great deal of work before, during and after the trip. Parents may spend hours packing, organising meals, keeping children safe, managing unexpected problems and trying to make sure everyone is having a good time. It can be easy to focus so much on everything that could go wrong that we forget how significant these experiences may become for our children.
A holiday does not need to be perfect to become a core memory. In fact, some of the stories families tell for years begin with something going completely wrong. The rainstorm, the wrong turn, the burnt dinner or the unexpected adventure can eventually become the story everyone laughs about around the table.
The important thing is that the memory exists. Because childhood passes quickly, and the experiences children have with the people they love become part of the stories they carry into adulthood. A family holiday does not need to be flawless, luxurious or packed with activities. It simply needs to be lived, shared and remembered.
